that electricity which i've been missing

last night i dreamt of wrapping bandages all around my pussy, sealing up the pain and holding in all the good stuff. in my dream i was so turned on by the bandages, i was jerking off. and i felt that feeling i've been missing.

so this morning when i awoke, it occurred to me, i never wake up with a hard on, i don't jerk off everyday (anymore)... and what's with this. i refuse this. so i closed my eyes, and i thought about things that turn me on or get me off.

i thought about anything, and i thought about you honey.

i thought about that empty room that will be mine in the new apartment. i thought about being handcuffed in there, naked and waiting for you. and i wouldn't have to be me, and you wouldn't have to be you... you could yell at me like you did when i put the toiletpaper on the roll wrong, in those early days.

and when you'd come in you'd release my hands so i could work my clit and.. and... and...

i felt it, that feeling spreading through me, that connection between mind and cunt... and i was ready... ready.. ready.. my fingers reaching down.. preparing for the first sweet touch and...

ed walked in.

so i got up.

and i didn't get off.

2006-07-12