lump

the words fall and float
delicate like snowflakes
crashing into the cement
leaving nothing but an stain
marking where they went
i can't stop the current
i don't try
the only resistance i feel
is the resistance inside
my walls
the way they were built to contain you
there is a sweet simple pleasure
of being filled by you
my back arching like a bridge
cross me to the other side
where things are good and green
and the water is deep enough
to hold us there

reality sparkles open
like a burst vein
the blood slithers
snake like down the drain
and i'm watching it
with wild eyes
not breathing or noticing breath
holding this promise of death
close to my chest
my mind is being rewired
last seconds, second chances
emergency, underfire
and i collapse into a pile of
quivering neurons
asking myself from the blast
can we find a higher high?

relating only to the numbers
which are carved into cords
the opening of corridors
and the opening of holes
there's nothing to want
but what's inside
so i slice and carve
and dig and dive
into some place so far down my throat
in my gut where the words were wrote
there's nothing more beautiful than now
in all it's wriggling simplicity
i take a breath
realease it
stare straight into the face of hell
believe it
and nothing i've done will be undone
i take the place of having faith
crushing all hope like pills beneath my feet
i'll take the long road
i'll cut the guts from the fish

2006-05-30